Happy Anniversary Ann Marie & Eddie

Saturday the 29th is the 5-year anniversary of my best friend Ann Marie and her husband, Eddie.

I've known each of them for 13 years, since we were at the School for Advanced Studies. They were close friends at that time but when they went away to college - their relationship blossomed. Ann Marie went to Boston University and Eddie went to UF. Together they racked up thousands of dollars in plane fare and telephone bills. But it all paid off.

Today, many young people wait until the 'right time' to get married, that is, when they are in the right place in their careers or life. Ann Marie and Eddie decided to get married at the right time for their relationship. As a result, they have been by each other's side as they worked to achieve the other 'right times'.

Marriage is a promise to spend a lifetime thinking about someone else's needs before yours; a lifetime of compromise; a lifetime of enduring not just your own troubles but those of someone else. However, as a result of those experiences - you get to share a lifetime of someone else's joys in addition to your own; a lifetime of knowing what it is to be truly loved by someone who has seen your best and worst.

A good marriage is rare - I am so proud of Ann Marie and Eddie for understanding that the value of the good times is far greater than the challenges of the hard times.

Alex and I are so blessed to have their friendship and I am so happy that this is a couple who I will have in my life forever. Ann Marie, we have shared SO much together in our lives. I cannot wait to share so many more of life's great experiences with you.

Much love-
Shaleen.

hanging with the boys

I love the fact that my job is flexible and lets us work from home when we need to. Today I had to read proposals for new contracts; and our 'open' office format (like a newsroom) just isn't conducive to reading.

So I got out my laptop, proposals, highlighter, pen, cell phones and water and sat out on my patio. My patio is where real work gets done. I have accomplished some major work for my job on my patio. This was the case today. It was such a nice day.

I also got to spend all day with Pete and Miles. We didn't really DO anything per se but they weren't alone and that makes me happy.

Here is Pete....being all quiet and thoughtful (shot taken while I sat behind my laptop):


This is when they are really having fun - Pete is the one in charge...but Miles isn't even trying. Pete sure is - he's got crazy-eyes.

something wicked this way comes

I'm so excited because on Saturday I'm going to see the Wicked the musical. I read the book a couple of years ago I really loved it. The premise is just so cool. Here is a synopsis from the publisher:

When Dorothy triumphed over the Wicked Witch of the West in L. Frank Baum's classic tale, we heard only her side of the story. But what about her arch-nemesis, the mysterious Witch? Where did she come from? How did she become so wicked? And what is the true nature of evil?

Gregory Maguire creates a fantasy world so rich and vivid that we will never look at Oz the same way again. Wicked is about a land where animals talk and strive to be treated like first-class citizens, Munchkinlanders seek the comfort of middle-class stability, and the Tin Man becomes the victim of domestic violence. And then there is the little green-skinned girl named Elphaba, who will grow up to become the infamous Wicked Witch of the West, a smart, prickly, and misunderstood creature who challenges all our preconceived notions about the nature of good and evil.

I will definitely post about the play on Sunday.

Monday, Schmonday

I've had a headache all day long and I also think that I was partially brain-dead. What I wear to work each day is determined, largely, by the number and type of meetings that I have that day. So this morning as I was staring at my closet, I did a mental run-through of my calendar. Nope, no meetings. But for some reason, I still decided to dress a little better than usual. (thank you, God).

I forgot to charge my blackberry, so I left it at home charging. So when I arrive to work, my headache is still there and my assistant asks me if I need anything for my first meeting. Whaaat? So I look at my calendar - I have a 9:00 internal meeting, a 10:00 meeting with people from NYC Health Corps that's been scheduled for a month, then a 1:00 meeting with my largest contractor at their offices. My headache does not go away despite having taken one round of my migraine medication. The second round at 12:00 begins making me a little 'soft' around the edges as it contains a mild muscle relaxer. Nonetheless, I get in my car and drive to my 1:00. The good thing is that the location of that meeting made it impossible to go back to the office and actually get any work done. So here I am at home at 4:00 ready to check my emails and see if I can get any work done before taking Miles for a bike ride.

My head feels "better" - like I have a headache that is being masked by medication.

Happy Easter

Today was such a nice day - a busy day after a busy weekend, but it was good. I had invited my parents, in-laws and Alex's sister and her family over for Easter/Alex's birthday lunch. So I got up early to bake a cake before going to church. I made Shanda's Gooey Cake (so delicious and sweet).

The day just started out right, I listened to Jars of Clay's Redemption Songs while I was cooking. I just had a great time with God there at home by myself (alex was already at church), and then driving in to church. I really felt like God was going to do something great that day.

Today was also the official launch of Christ Fellowship's Downtown Campus. We've been there for months but this is the official launch. Church was great, they started a leader-service at 9:00 - so that we can still hear the sermon although we are serving during the main service at that campus.

Last week, I had spent some time reading the Easter story of Christ's arrest, crucifixion and resurrection. I read one thing that I had never seen before. In John 17, Jesus is praying with his disciples (before the Garden), specifically he is praying FOR them and that they will be strengthened by the spirit after his death. But then the prayer continues to pray for those who WILL believe in him in the future. He is praying for ME and all other believers. It is such a personal prayer, and especially in John 17:24 - Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. I love that - Jesus knows that he is about to die for us, and his prayer to God is that he just wants to be with us in the world as it was meant to be. THAT is exactly why he did what he did.

shaleen <--- a heel

Yesterday was Alex's birthday. overall it was a really nice day. The teachers at the school had a cake for him as a surprise and had called me several days ago so that I could be there to surprise him. He was, in fact, surprised and the teachers had a lot of fun. I stayed there for a while and then we both left to go home. We watched part of a movie and then went to dinner w/ his parents at an argentinian steak place.

It was all good, we at lot of meat that was paraded in front of us, we had good conversation. And then in the parking lot, we talked about politics with his parents. That's where the problems started. Overall, I think that I was fine in the conversation. Back in our car Alex thought I was too sensitive (as he says is typical when politics is discussed). I disagreed, and I just took it so personally. We argued, I believe that what I FELT about what he said to me was accurate but I am completely lacking in how to argue appropriately. I am sure that I blew it out of proportion. We got over the argument when we got home, but the night was really tainted.

So this morning, I just felt like crap for having a stupid argument on this birthday. I was reminded of a verse in Romans 7:19 - For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.

We don't argue very often, but when we do it may go something like this - I get upset for something he says to me, I blame him for attacking me, I blow it out of proportion, I accuse him of being the one who is really blowing it out of proportion. Alex is a sensitive person, too, so sometimes the tables are turned (my own self-defense).

But why do I do that?

random blogs

I don't know how broad my readership has gotten, but this is for those of you reading this on any kind of regular basis.

I don't know if you've noticed but at the top of the page blogspot has link that says 'Next Blog'. have you clicked on it (do it after you read this, not before). Anyway, I do it every so often - and people blog about weird things. I've seen folk-jewelry, and a blog that apparently is the formal record of a small town's council meetings (really).

Then there are some like this one. These are fairly random pictures - it looks like it's written in Dutch. I want to know what he is saying about those pictures!

Now you can click on the link and check out some random blog....

life's simply pleasures

One of the simplest joys that I have in my life is listening to This American Life. If you're lucky, this show is broadcast on your local NPR station. It is just SO cool. The entire premise of the show is to highlight the extraordinary things that normal people do in this world. People are so extremely entertaining. If you have an iPod you can subscribe to the podcast and listen to it free. I listen to it really often on my way home from work. Here are some things that they've talked about:

An american journalist in Iraq who thought it would be a good idea to rent a house and sub-rent the rooms rather than staying in a hotel on the living stipend he received. he ended up over $60K upside down on the deal after some pretty amazing experiences.

Interviews with kids talking about their observations about how poor a job most adults do at talking to kids.

24-hours of interviews with people who visit a 24-hour diner in Chicago --pretty interesting.

Stories about being in the middle of nowhere - like an island in the Pacific, or when you realize that you're in the middle of nowhere even though you seem to be in the middle of it all.

David and Goliath - unlikely stories of 'littles' beating 'bigs'

A whole bunch of stories where the common theme is chickens.

Stories about real-life detectives or people who end up in the middle of their very own unlikely mysteries and have to get to the bottom of it

Stories of people whose reputations end up far different than they expected by accident

You get the idea. Every episode is made up a vignettes or audio essays that are all linked to a common theme but with their own take. It's awesome -- it is one of my FAVORITE things in life.

Happy Underwear Day

When I was in college my friends and I had this thing that if one of us was having a bad day - then we would all go out and each buy her a new pair of panties. Our theory was this: it is fun to get fun, new panties for no reason and they would cheer our friend up. And also, that after that day, you would always be reminded, whenever you would wear one of those pairs of panties that it was a gift from a friend. Plus we always made the presentation of the panties something of a show. For example, our friend Abby broke up with a guy - so we all bought her panties - returned to our dorm and made her sit in a chair while we blasted 'I will survive' and then we each presented her with her new panties as we sang the song. I'm sure those cheered her up for a long time. Whenever we did this, we would call it Happy Underwear Day

Anyway, I wasn't down today for any reason, but I was reminded of this b/c I came home from work today to find a package on my step. I rarely receive packages. It was from my best friend Lourdes as a thank-you for co-hosting her baby shower she bought be 4 new pairs of beautiful panties.

it was a special gift too b/c she wanted to help spice up the Alaskan cruise that Alex and I have coming up in May. This is whole separate post for another day, but Alex and I have been working to overcome an infertility issue. Hopefully it's resolved now but we'll know in the coming months. I know that there will be more posts about that some other time - but if you want to know what's up just email me. We're pretty open about it.

children see, children do - worth remembering

I won't even add my own comments on this...but let it speak for itself.

Happy management problem

I am dealing with the best kind of management problem. I have to do performance reviews on two contract managers on my staff...and I am having the hardest time trying to find anything critical to say. This is only a problem b/c I don't want to be totally positive b/c it doesn't give them anything to work on. But it's still a good problem to have. I have worked so hard to build a cohesive team and I have to say that at The Trust, I have one powerhouse team. I love working with them all. They are able to deal with the fact that I am in so many meetings that I'm barely available to review their work or give them detailed guidance - they are all able to take the little instruction they get from me and run with it. That's ideal.

This is the exact opposite problem that Alex has at our child care center where he deals with the worst HR problems ever. The staff there are constantly quitting or calling in sick, or he'll hire someone and then she won't come to work. It's horrible. Plus he has to work with all women...which I'm sure you can image is not a ton of fun for him.

Before & After

We have just completed our first major home project. We bought our house almost a year ago. It was a long and frustrating process to find a house in Miami - but the wait was worth it. We bought this house from an older couple, who we think were fairly crazy, OCD to be exact. But it was good for us b/c the house was in perfect condition - they were meticulous.

Here is before: Three shades of pink + spanish tile roof + traditional brick....ugh. (that's the former owner in the photo with our realtor...)


It took a long time to finally get around to painting - but we finally did it. Here is after:


The house is some shade of white, with mahogany accent and a tan trim. The door is a rust-colored red.

Yay for home improvements!

So this is a what Saturdays are like?

Alex and I have about the next month off from weddings.  I am SO excited.   I love working with him, and I certainly won't complain that his business is doing so well.  But we have been busy, very busy.  We shot weddings every single weekend since the new year.  We are tired.

So last weekend began our big break.  But this weekend we really didn't have anything to do.  I have to be honest...I wasn't quite sure what to do w/ myself.  So what did I do?  I found work to do (at least after a while).

First, it rained today - again. It's not supposed to rain so often in March is it?  Normally it wouldn't bother me except that we were supposed to have our house painted this weekend.  I was so mad.  But it stopped in the early morning so if it doesn't rain again tonight or tomorrow the guy will come tomorrow.

Then my mom called to go to the mall.  That was fun. I bought Alex some jeans and shirts b/c he seriously needs clothes.  My mom got her makeup done at the clinique counter - the girl was so good, she taught her how to use foundation right - she taught us both some stuff!

When I got home...well I couldn't just sit around.  So I began the big clean.  Now at 6:00 I'm finally done.  I vacuumed and mopped.  Then I washed and dried Pete, then I washed and dried Miles.  

Washing and drying Miles is a mission, really.  First you have to wash him w/ dog shampoo and rinse; then wash him with people shampoo w/ conditioner (b/c he has so much hair).  Then you have to towel dry him.  Then I put him in the garage so that he doesn't roll in the grass or get in the dirt.  Then I change my clothes because I'm usually soaked by that time.  Then I get him out of the garage and take him for a long bike ride.  The bike ride serves two purposes.  First it helps w/ the drying process b/c he just runs and runs.  Second, for whatever reason, after getting a bath Miles gets himself all worked up -- so he needs that long run to get the energy out.  After all of that, he is dry enough to come in the house without getting my clean tile dirty.

So, now it's 6:30 and Alex is at church working....I guess I'll relax now, unless I find something else that needs to be done.

New stuff on the other blog

I don't have too much to say about my own life at the moment.  The only exciting thing is that I went to the spa yesterday and got a facial.  My mother-in-law gave me a gift card to the spa for Christmas and I've been saving it.  I decided to use it now since the next month of work will be C R A Z Y.

Only other thing is that there is lots of new stuff up on the Candidly Elegant blog.  We don't usually do maternity photos, but these are friends of ours from church.  Enjoy!

Awesome night

I cannot recall when I've had more fun in the past several months. Last night, all of my high school friends got together at Scully's, a local tavern. Alex and I go there once a week probably b/c it's quiet and they have the best burger ever. But Wednesday is karaoke night. We have not been here before on Wednesday. Last night, we were joined by my best friend Ann Marie and her husband Eddie (both from my high school), my friends Gloria and Jennean (from middle school), my friend Crissa and her boyfriend Billy Jack.  We really all got together b/c Crissa was in town - she has lived outside of Miami for years in NYC and now in Asheville.  

I had such a great time with everyone - but for sure the karaoke was a highlight.  Firstly, the Scully's crowd is clearly comprised of advanced-level karaoke singers.  About 4 of them were just awesome.  Then our crowd joined in.  I sang Wonderwall, Alex sang Tiny Dancer, Eddie sang a song by Keane, Billy Jack sang a oldies song and also an old-school rap song, Crissa sang I'm your Angel and Gloria sang a Tenacious D song.  

The entire night was awesome, I wish we could do it all the time....I wish Crissa and Billy Jack didn't live so far away.  :(

The process is the point

Think about the richest and most fulfilling relationship you have...got it? Probably, this is your spouse or a sibling, parent, boyfriend or girlfriend. Regardless, it is someone in which you have much invested and vice versa.

Here is my question - did that relationship reach that level immediately? No. In order to reach that point it took emotional risk. Reaching that level in a relationship requires that we take a step of faith--knowing full well that we may get hurt, embarrassed, angry, ashamed, etc.

The point is, we only reached that level with that person who knows us and loves us best after opening up and taking that risk. If you're like me - as you think about that relationship and reflect on the fulfillment you receive from it - you are probably not thinking just about today, right now. You are thinking about the process -- what it was like to reach the point of today, right now with that person. The process IS the point.

So, I heard a sermon that wasn't really on this topic but just had the phrase the process is the point and it made me think about all that I've said up to now and what I will say. People who are skeptical of God commonly cite the defense that He appears to be confusing, unclear, unfair or inconsistent.

I find it odd, that one who doesn't know Him is so quick and certain to make statement of His character. You don't even know Him. If people were willing to just try a little bit of a relationship with God, it would be amazing for their lives. Take an emotional (or spiritual) risk -- if you are unwilling to believe in the first place then, really, what do you have to lose?

I think it is a fair comparison to look at the process of knowing God and a close human relationship - like I have with Alex. But what is mind blowing is how insignificant that relationship is compared to how that same process unfolds with God. But it's the best comparison I could make.

Lourdes' Baby Shower

A couple of weeks ago I co-hosted a baby shower for one of my best friends - Lourdes.  I co-hosted along with her sister, Ana and her mother.  Here are some photos from the day.   Lourdes is the first of my really close friends to have a baby.  I have lots of friends with children but this is different somehow.  In the past year or so, I have this sense that our lives have recently turned a new chapter.  My friends and I are far more settled, mature and content with our lives.  As a result, I think that our friendships have also progressed to a new level as we now have new experiences to share.

I was so pleased to have a part in helping to welcome this new baby into the world. I CANNOT wait to meet her!

Everyone LOVED the cake.  Not only was it pretty but it was delicious too!